Shawn Bowers

Well now, here’s a hunk if we’ve ever seen one (and we’ve seen dozens). Hailing from the wheat-fed plains of Kansas, this six foot two professional bald will definitely not rile up your parents when you pay him to start dating you. He will also always hold the door open for you and will never NOT give you as many kisses as you ask for at the end of the night, as long as all of your paperwork is in order. He’s available to be your fiancée, your existing husband, your writer, your director, your mischief maker, your alibi, your best friend who you’re confused about your feelings for, or just hire him to be general hunk ambiance at a cool loft party. Too much? The question you should be asking is “how much?” The answer is “more than you can afford.” And the follow up question is “are you sure this is legal?”

Why I like to work at Jellyvision

I sit in a location where there used to be a full-size working telephone booth, and even though that’s obviously a much cooler thing than me sitting quietly at a desk, everyone is still very polite to me.

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Times on Canadian soil:

Never had the pleasure.

Pet I heart most:

Dog

The correct answer:

David Lee Roth